We are achieving this through a group and individual therapeutic process work. The processing work includes work with deep, usually suppressed and repressed emotions. For many people inner emotional world represents something strange, and for others is threatening and dangerous. Our conscious part of ego has developed a range of defensive mechanisms in order to avoid contact with unbearable and too painful emotions that are shaking us from the deep within our personality. If we have had a better emotional regulation in our sensitive and formational early period when those emotions were raising, today our emotions wouldn’t be so horrifying and strange and we wouldn’t have to activate mechanisms of dissociation and suppression. Given the fact that one basic and important part of us remained unknown to our conscious ego, it irrupts and overwhelms us without us even knowing it, while our system didn’t have the chance to develop a capability for regulation of emotions, and goes on with all the defensive forces it has in order not to be connected with them.

Some people do this with anger which goes suppressed consciously or unconsciously (suppression and repression) and in the end resulting with big consequences on our physical health. By some, fear is emotion that is threatening so we talk about phobias, panic attacks or anxieties. Many are suppressing a huge amount of sorrow and aren’t even aware of it, resulting with problems in emotional relationships and health. A sense of shame or the feeling of unworthiness represents an emotion that is very destructive in such a way that we are witnessing very strong emotional reactions when being criticized.

This common inner emotional mess, having the emotional wounds from the early period, non satisfied primary needs, poor capacity of self-regulation…they make us unpleasant towards others as they make us feel bad about ourselves remaining easily excitable, short-tempered or emotionaly frozen. Our perception is that others are guilty for the way we feel, not realizing that this is our responsibility. This is like having a big wound on our shoulder and we aren’t aware of it. We only do know that when someone try to hug us, we get the urge to punch that person down momentarily. From our perspective, this is the other’s fault because it hurts, but the reality is that the wound is ours and the only thing we can do is to heal it in order to function normally with others.

The Personal Development is dedicated exactly to this end, but the journey is neither child’s play neither painless. We need to open and recognize our wounds, understand when and how did they appear, finish inner blocked emotional processes and slowly by working through emotions and primary needs we grow, changing our inner world and remodeling our opinions, self-perception as of the world itself. Becomes what it was supposed to be if there weren’t any trauma and in case we have had the conditions for one complete formation and maturation.

Insufficient reception of necessary attachment conditions and / or primary needs in the critical period of a child’s development result in insufficient realization of a full person’s potential for a self-regulation, which leads to painful emotional statuses tendency, especially in cases of emotional break ups or rejections.

Besides the overwhelming feeling of rage or sorrow, many are found in the position of a victim of the fear itself that is urging out uncontrolled, leading by some to panic attacks, and by others manifesting as “just a feeling” of anxiety that is easily activated when the life situation comes deteriorated.

• Social emotional relations – problematic loving relationships, incapacity of growing or retaining a deep connection with a partner, great pain after breaking up, fear of letting oneself into a relationship, lack of emotions, lack of empathy, lack of trust, excessive jealousy, a feeling of loneliness and disconnection.
• Relationship with a Self – unworthiness, low self-esteem (self-consciousness), narcissistic behavior, arrogance, competitiveness, perfectionism.
• Inner emotional state and emotional processing – the prevailing state of inner restlessness, uncertainty and disquiet (anxiety), depressive state, poor regulation of emotions and affect (explosiveness), arrogance, incapacity for a fast and easy return to a positive emotional state.
• Psychological functioning – black & white perception of the world (me and mine is right and worthy, and others are wrong and less worthy), incapacity for taking a criticism, animosity towards diversity (others and different), attitudes rigidity, subconscious false beliefs.
• De-regulated physiology – urge for outer regulation with alcohol, drugs, nicotine, food, intense physical activity (dependence on drudging sports), medicine (antipsychotics, anxiolytics, “SSIR”…) and somatic health problems.

The Personal Development Program lasts for four years and makes part of education for an Early Developmental-realationalship Trauma Therapist. You can sign it in after passing the Parenthood and Early Development Program, which begins every autumn and currently can be signed in at Zagreb and Rijeka. There is a possibility of signing for a video lectures which represent the basics for the program on the button below.